Thursday, August 30, 2012

Transoesophaegal echo

My cardiologist can ponounce that words fluently and laju gila macam keretapi express without even blinking.. Siap boleh pakai perkataan tu byk kali dalam satu ayat yg sama.. hahahaha..

Me?

Aku tak teringin pon nak cuba pronounce slow2 apetah lagik laju2.. Kang terbelit lidah aku lagik sekali kang tak pasal jek kan.. hehe..

Anyway, that is the procedure that i undergone yesterday petang..
Dah la mase tuh all my good and visible veins semua dah kena cucuk. So memang dah takde tempat yg tak kena cucuk.. Traumatize dah urat2 aku.. sob sob..

Untuk buat procedure nih diorang nak kena buat satu "line" so terpaksa la kena surender cucuk urat yg sama.. Tu tak kira cucuk2 yg tak berjaya lagik tuh.. Overall aku kira ade 10 injections sites.. *cringe*

Tapi takpe la.. Aku buat jek la muka strong.. Kadang2 aku pon kesian tengok nurses tu kesian kat aku setiap kali diorang cucuk tak jumpa urat.. redha jek la.. Sakit sikit2 takpe lah buat menghapus dosa2 kecil kan.. (dosa2 kecik aku pon silap2 satu lori so kira okla tu kan.. hehehe)..

Daripada semalam aku dok tanye doktor..

"Pengsan ke doctor mase procedure"

Doctor jawap: "Normally I just gave local anasthetic for my other patients, but if you want I can give you sedation"

"Oh.. semua orang pon tak pengsan eh. Okla, nevermind, just give me local too then"

That's how I make myself buat2 berani.. Macam mase nak masuk MRI machine tu.. cuaks la jugak.. But i kept thinking.. "Alaa.. depan aku `tadik ade 5 orang lagik yg masuk mesin yg sama.. chill la.."

So menggunakan approach yg sama.. semalam aku pon memberanikan la diri.. Sambil pikir banyak orang lain dah pernah experience the same procedures.. Tu tak kira lagik banyak orang lain yg dugaan lagik berat dari aku kan.. So aku gagah kan la diri..

Sekali horror nak mampos ok..

Kamera tu panjang nak mampos.. Ade la panjang sudu and tebal boleh tahan jugak la.. Aku tengok pon rase nak tercekik inikan pulak i need to actually swallow it! Nangesss... Huhuhu..

Tapi sebab awal2 dah cakap tanak sedative kan... Ku gagah kan jua..

After a few tries.. and I keep gagging..

Doctor aku yg baik hati cakap.. "You want me to give you sedative?"

Dengan satu nafas ioils jawap: "Yes please doctor"

Kah kah kah.. (mase tu sungguh la tak kelakor nye.. Nak nanges pon ade rase dah..)

Tapiiiii.. ingatkan doktor nak kasik fengsan.. sekali doktor kasi sikit jek untuk bagi aku bertenang.. Kategori "High" pon tak sampai.. huhuhuh...

So cuba la lagik sekali jolok kamera tuh.. Sambil air mata yg kluar sama banyak ngan air liur... Sedih sangat rase.. huhuhu..

Still rase mcm nightmare lepas procedure semalam.. Macam mana la orang lain menempuh nya.. Satu malam suntuk tekak aku sakit gila sampai rase nak demam semalam..

Malam semalam plak tido pakai Holster or somethng.. untuk check palpitation jantung..

Esok insyaallah boleh discharged..I can't wait to see Hiro.. huhu..

This has been a humbling experience for me..
I still remember, sometimes bila aku dah penat sgt or stress sangat.. Bila pegi melawat org kat sepital yg sakit tak teruk la.. dok pikir.. kan best kalau dapat dok sepital tapi tanak sakit teruk2.. huhuhu..

Kelmarin pon ade member aku ddtg melawat, pehtu dia dok cakap "waaa.. best nyee... i also want.."

Hehehe.. Sebab jeles tgk aku berehat sepanjang hari (dia tak tau aku nih dah macam guinea pig; the fat, cute and adorable version la tapik; asek kuar masuk bilik treatment/ labs buat test :P)

So i told her.. "Be careful what you wish for aa" Hehe

Have a happy and healthy life peeps..

PS: Selamat Hari Merdeka

Wednesday, August 29, 2012

The scare of my life!

Last monday..
Woke up and went to work like usual.
I didn't feel particularly lazy to work last monday cause i already started working since Raya ke-4..

By lunch time..
I'm having a ddiscussion with my collegue.
Admittedly.. I was kinda stress (not with the colleague but with the topic)..
Integrated Assurance Framework in case korang curious.. Hahahha..

Tetiba mase aku tgh bercakap2 tuh.
Aku jadik tergagap gagap..
And can't pronoune my words well..

Aku dah agak panic..
So aku pegi minum air skejap..
Bila nak sambung discuss still aku tak leh nak pronounce dgn betul..
The word that I was trying to pronounce was "process"..

2-3 kali try and i was mumbling crazy..
"Fo less".. "Sel fess". or whatever..
There and then i knew something is very wrong with me..

I told my friend..
Tolong.. Call 911.. (while writing the word` 911 on paper)..
In my panic I remembered telling them I'm having a heart attack..
But actually I really thought I;m having a stroke..

My colleagues were all train on first aid..
So one of them was quick to pull up both my hands on air..
And asked me to breath..

I on the other hand was trying to talk..
Struggling hard to make sure I can pronounce the word "process"
After that i repeat the word "process" 2 kali... Sampai kawan aku suh diam..
Jgn bercakap2.. Suh rilex..
By then I can mengucap and berselawat and baca ayat kursi..
And i started crying by then..

To cut a longer story short..
I had my first ambulance ride.. from KLCC to PrinceCourt Medical Centre..

I've been here for 2 nights already..
The doctors told me what i had was call a mini stroke.. (the term is TIA sila lah google kalau rajin).
It is similar like a stroke.. But whereas stroke effect may linger more than 24 hours..
TIA is shorter span.. and normally within 30 minutes you're back to usual..
In my case i think the episod only lasted few seconds.. but indeed it felt like the longest time..

To date.. I've had more jabs than I could count.. A total of 20 tabung uji of blood extracted and being tested.. Alhamdullillah all results are normal.. Within 48 hours. I've had more test and procedure that I ever imagine i would take.. Especially not on one go anyway..

I've had a chest x-ray.. an ECG (to see the movement of my heart).. a MRI (to see the shape of my brain)..a MRA (to see all the "wires" connecting to my brain).. an ECHO (to see the shape of my heart).. and an EEG (to see the movement of my brain waves)..

Banyak kan..

Cause TIA in young adults are not normal.. and since there's a risk of reoccurence.. my doctors are making sure every single things and aspects are checked.. And I am glad for that.. Cause even now.. I am still scared shitless.,. thinking that I can get it again anytime soon.. and this time maybe not so harmless.. nauzubillah..

Most of my results are cleared.. Nothing wrong with my brain (no stroke detected at bain area).. So now focus kat area jantung plak.. Cause kalau ade clot kat jantung pon  boleh cause stroke.. Hopefully takde apepe.. Doctor pon dah cakap about 40% of TIA in young adults takleh pinpoint what is the causes.. So berdoa jek la no recurrence..

This is a wake up call for me..
This is Allah's way to show me that I have to be more thankful in all that i have in life..
Untuk memperbanyakkan amal ibadat.. Untuk lebih cekal dan tabah menghadapi dugaan and rintangan..

Having said that, I will have to undergone quite a change in lifestyle..
Kena jaga makan.. kena exercise.. kena manage stress..
I'm sharing my story with you so that you guys boleh mengambil iktibar..
Dan mula  mengamalkan cara hidup sihat okay :)

On stress management..
Admittedly I've been unddergoing quite a bit of stress lately..
What with work stress.. Life problems..

I used to rant everything in my blog..
But after the case with the "in-law" blog post tuh.. Terus aku takde selera nak menulis apepe dalam blog.. except for my holiday tales jek..
But i think that's not good.. sebab byk mende aku simpan and pendam sendirik dalam hati..

So from today onwards.. i'm not gonna give a damn..
You can either choose to read what i write..
Or you are most welcome not  to come back here again..

PS: Please pray for my speedy recovery ya. Thanks


Friday, August 17, 2012

Selamat Hari Raya

Youols..
Lama sgt mak tak hapdet blog khen?
Huhuhu..
Busy mengalah retis sungguh :P

Anyway, sempena hari baik bulan baik nih..
Iols menyusun 10 jari tangan dan kaki iouols yang chanteks baru lepas
buat mani pedi tadik.. eh..
Memohon ampun dan maaf sekira ade yg termakan cili dia rasa pedas
dengan hasil2 penulisan tidak bertauliah iouls ini.. Opps..
Dan kepada kawan2 di luar sana.. Maaf zahir batin..
Jemput lah datang ke rumah.. (sila tepong dulu kalau tanak makan
biskut lutut cicah air kosong ye... heheheh)

On a different note..
Ending of ramadhan always bring bitter sweet memories to me..
Since I lost my arwah mak 5 days before Syawal in the year 2006 :(
So I always feel sad and nak menangis if i think about that..
And raya is DEFINETELY will never be the same anymore without her..
Moga roh nya dicucuri rahmat.. Amin..

But life goes on..
And this year our family got another new addition..
Little Zara..
Aunty dia yg over nih sangat2 lah eksaited nak sambut raya ngan anak
buah baru.. Hehehe..

Okla youols..
Kerja pon semua dah siap..
Meja dah berkemas..
Kuih raya dah packing..
Suami pon dah sampai menjemput pegi bershopping last minute.. ;)

SELAMAT HARI RAYA..
MAAF ZAHIR BATIN

Be safe where ever we are okay

XoXo
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